WHAT DO YOU KNOW ABOUT THE 1ST NIGHT OF
MARRIAGE, {LAYLA TU ZAFAF}???
The first night of marriage
is one of the best night of
marriage couples which
they enter the night with
full expectation of
goodness but some merely
lacks the knowledge about
the first night which is
bad!!!.
It is unfortunate to notice
that our young men and
women who are absolutely
not ready for marriage and
even if they are ready for
marriage seek to take
advice from bad friends
who dont know anything
about that but to expose
them to watch
pornographic movie to
satisfy their curiosity
which is totally forbidden
in Islam. The eye that is
seeking to watch the
nackedness of someone
would be questioned and
severe torment for such
people.
Dear Newly married
couples or would-be
married couples; The
wedding night is such a
blessful night in which
every couple who have
remain chaste and keep
their virginity are waiting
for cos of the enjoyment of
the blessful night!!!.
The night starts when the
bride is presented to the
groom and the groom
enters the room with a
smiling face and
say’Assalam alaykum’and
the shy bride with her soft
enticing voice should
respond’Wa alaykum
salam’..!!!
It is in the Sunnah that
both couples should not
rush into something very
fast but should perform
two nafila as narrated in a
hadith of the Prophet:
“When you enter upon your
wife (for the first time), you
have first to perform two
rak’ats and then hold your
wife’s head and say, “
Allaahumma ennee
as’aluka khayrahaa wa
khayra maa jabaltahaa
alayhe, wa auuzubeka
minn sharrehaa wa sharre
maa jabaltahaa alayhe ).
(O Allah! Bless my wife for
me,bless me for my wife,
give her bounty out of me,
and give me bounty out of
her!”Then you can do what
you want.”[Reported by
Abu Dawud]. Then after
that there follow the sacred
union!!!.
Before the sacred union,
there are things which
should be observe so as to
make that night special.
1.Make Her
Comfortable.The husband
should try to make the wife
comfortable by presenting
her a drink or a sweet cos
from the hadith of Asmaa
bint Yazeed ibn al-Sain
who said’I prepared the
beautiful Aishah for the
Messenger of Allah (saw).
Then he came and I called
him to see her in all her
beauty.He came and sat
next to her. He was
brought a large cup that
contained milk. He drank
and she put her head
down.).
2. The woman on that first
night become very shy
which is normal and so the
husband should not be
rude to her but should treat
her with kindness and
good romantic words.
3. Cleanliness must be
ensured on that night and
it is preferable to make the
surrounding tidy and not to
use a bright light but a
blue romantic light as
some couples may feel
uneasy with a bright bulb.
5. Make sure you arrange
your marriage at a time
when the bride is clean and
not in her menses as the
Quran says :{They ask thee
concerning women’s
courses. Say: They are a
hurt and pollution:So keep
away from women in their
courses, and do not
approach them until they
are clean. But when they
have purified themselves,
ye may approach them as
ordained for you by Allah
for Allah loves those who
turn to Him constantly and
He loves those who keep
themselves pure and
clean.}[Al-Baqarah: 222].
So keep this in mind
please!!!.
4. It is permissible that
they take off all their
clothes and be completely
naked, but it is better for
them to be under a
common sheet, for the
Prophet(SAW) said:“ Verily
Allah is modest and
discreet and He likes
modesty and
discretion.” (Related
byAhmad, Al-Tirmidhi, and
AbuDawud).So please
beware of that!!.
The sacred union is not
entered in without any
intimacy like the way
animals approach each
other but it starts with an
a romantic forelplay.
Foreplay play a major role
in the sexual stimulation of
the couples especially the
woman. Even the Prophet
was narrated in hadith
where the Prophet said we
should marry a young girl
so that you may play with
her and she with you?
[Reported by Al-Bukhari]
Jabir also related,When I
married, Allah’s Messenger
(pbuh) said to me, What
type of lady have you
married? I replied, I have
married a non-virgin
woman. He said, Why, do
not you have a liking for
the virgins and for fondling
them? [Reported by Al-
Bukhari] . This is because
a virgin woman has the
luster of pleasure, clings to
her husband and is easy to
be learned what her
husband wants to implant
of good manners. So the
first time to have sex with
your partner is very critical.
Both of you may be
fumbling and do not know
what he or she ought to
do. This is because both of
you plan how to lose his or
her virginity as fast as
possible.
Kissing, fondling and
Caressing one’s wife is so
important at that moment.
Speak to her about your
love and passion.Get to
know each other’s body.
Take your time in caressing
each other and you will
began to stimulate and
ready for the union. Some
people think of foreplay as
a disguesting and
undecent to do with one’s
cos of their so_ called
piety but let me tell you
my brothers and sisters; it
is not a sign of piety to
abstain from such
activities, for there is no
place for monasticism
(rahbaniyya) in Islam. It is
a practical religion
whereone may fulfil his/
her needs in a permissible
way. Piety (taqwa)
.However, this is totally
incorrect, for who can
possibly be more
pious,pure and God-fearing
than the Messenger of
Allah (Allah bless
him&give him peace), yet
not only did he encourage
foreplay, etc,but practically
engaged in it with his
wives, as we have learnt
from the authentic hadith.
Imam Ibn al-Qayyim (Allah
have mercy on him)reports
in his famous “Tibbal-
Nabawi” that the
Messenger of Allah (Allah
bless him & give him
peace) forbade from
engaging in sexual
intercourse before foreplay.
So In conclusion, it is
important that the husband
fulfils the wife right of
foreplay and kissing. It is
not something that he
should be shy or reluctant
about. Some individuals
regard practices related to
foreplay to be
“inappropriate” and
consider abstinence from
such activities to be from
piety (taqwa).However ,
this is totally ignorance
and so should practise
Islam When the foreplay is
at it peak and couples are
ready for the union, the
couples should recite this
supplication which the
Prophet was narrated
saying :”If,whenever
anyone of you makes
sexual approach to his or
her mate, you say:
“( Allaahumma jannebnash
shaytaan, wa jannebesh
shaytaan maa razaqtanaa )
.”O Allah, keep Satan away
from us, and keep him
away from any offspring
You may bless us with,
then the Satan will never
harm any offspring you are
destined to produce.
People are curious to
watch pornographic films
in the view of getting to
know styles for doing the
union which is wrong!.
There are many common
ways in which couples
physically position
themselves for sexual
intercourse.The man-on-
top position is the most
common and preferable of
all intercourse positions. In
some cases such a
position may turn upside
down, to be woman-on-top
position. But it is harmful
to have sexual intercourse
with your wife while
standing.It is also better
not to eat a heavy
meal,since that will just
make you sleepy.
Some women may feel
uneasy when she is
suddenly break her
virginity but the pleasure is
the most wanted and the
satisfaction that you are
doing it with a lawful
man.And For your
information, there is a
moment in the union,
which is the climax and the
pleasure at that moment is
a very satisfying
enjoyment the couples had
never had in their lives but
waiting for such night,
they enjoy it to the fullest
cos that is what Allah has
ordain for them.
The man should seek to
satisfy the woman sexually
so does the woman and so
in this case the Prophet
said”Whoever has sexual
intercourse with his wife
and wants to do that again
would better make
ablution.”[Reported by
Ahmad]”. And after the
union, the couples should
take bath and taking a
ritual bath together is
preffered cos it was
narrated that the Prophet
said :On the authority
of’Aisha (may Allah be
pleased with her) who
said: “I used to bathe with
the Prophet from a single
container of water which
was placed between us
such that our hands
collided inside it. He used
to race me such that
would say:”Leave some for
me, leave some for me!.
She added:”We were in a
state of major ritual
impurity (i.e. the state of
janabah ). So it is very
good for couples to have
this bath before
undertaking any act, then
the blessful first night has
ended.
My dear Brothers and
Sisters; islam has lay
down everything for us so
let not our curiosity expose
us to the undecent dangers
from the unbelievers. Islam
has everything and so let
seek knowledge please..
My dear; the first night is
full of blessing and
enjoyment and it can only
be enjoyed by virgins and
sacred widows. Please
keep your virginity for that
special husband of yours
please cos it is an honour
to meet your husband a
virgin. Dont date but enter
into marriage please. A
brother should remain
chaste and not commit
zina , worship Allah and
obey His commandment
and you shall be granted a
good fantastic wedding
night in sha Allah.
May Allah show us that
special night and may
Allah bless any one who
wants to enter into
marriage but not dating.
May Allah guide us all.
Ameen. Allah knows
best!!!.
Writer:Amina Muhammad
Source:http://happymuslimfamily.net/
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