By: Moulana Afzal Ismail
Source: Pearls from the Path volume 3
A man came to ‘Umar (Allah be well pleased with him) to complain about his wife. As he reached his door, he heard Umm Kulthum, ‘Umar’s wife (Allah be well pleased with them both), speaking harshly to him.
The man thought to himself, “I intended to complain about my wife to him, but he appears to be afflicted with the same problem as I am experiencing.”
He turned around and began to leave. ‘Umar (Allah be well pleased with him) noticed him leaving and called him back.
When questioned about his visit, he explained, “I came to complain to you about my wife, but I overheard your wife and decided to leave.”
‘Umar (Allah be well pleased with him) explained, “I have adopted a forgiving nature towards her because of the rights she has upon me. Firstly, she serves as a barrier between me and hell-fire and my heart is contented with her as she saves me from indulging in haram. Secondly, she protects my wealth when I leave my home. Thirdly, she washes my clothes. Fourthly, she attends to the upbringing of my children and fifthly, she cooks and prepares my food.”
After hearing this, the man replied, “I enjoy the same benefits from my wife, but I never overlooked her faults and shortcomings. In future, I shall do so.”
Thus, one of the secrets of marital bliss and harmony is to focus on the positives of one’s spouse and forgive the shortcomings.
May Allah Most High bless us with that wonderful ability.